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Posts by Flagg Eagleton - Patriot

About Flagg Eagleton - Patriot
Flagg Eagleton is the son of an American potato farmer and a patriot. After spending 4 years in the Navy and 7 on welfare picking himself up by the bootstraps, Flagg finally got his HVAC certificate and is hard at work keeping the mobile homes of Tallahassee at a comfy 83 degrees.
Pelosi Overheard Predicting ‘Melania Will Divorce Trump After He Loses in November’

Pelosi Overheard Predicting ‘Melania Will Divorce Trump After He Loses in November’

Posted by By Flagg Eagleton - Patriot Posted inDemocrats Satirically Offending
Melania has hired a high-powered divorce attorney to fleece President Trump as soon as his loss is official. 
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AOC Calls for Arrest of Rudy Guliani

AOC Calls for Arrest of Rudy Guliani

Posted by By Flagg Eagleton - Patriot Posted inAOC Satire Tending Your Bar
Giuliani's recent scandalous behavior is a crime, she insists.
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Hanes Overwhelmed With Orders for Biden T-Shirts

Hanes Overwhelmed With Orders for Biden T-Shirts

Posted by By Flagg Eagleton - Patriot Posted inBiden Satire For Delusional Trumpsters To Hate
After the debate, demands for Biden products have soared.
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Obama and Osama Seen Fishing Together in Hawaii

Obama and Osama Seen Fishing Together in Hawaii

Posted by By Flagg Eagleton - Patriot Posted inObama Fan Fiction, Silly Tater Satire
Who are they fooling?
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DHS Reports Record Number of Amnesty Applications

DHS Reports Record Number of Amnesty Applications

Posted by By Flagg Eagleton - Patriot Posted inBiden Satire For Delusional Trumpsters To Hate
Biden's presidency will be historically diverse, it seems.
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Squad Demands U.S. Pay Retribution to Bin Laden Family

Squad Demands U.S. Pay Retribution to Bin Laden Family

Posted by By Flagg Eagleton - Patriot Posted inSilly Tater Satire
Not our tax money!
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Radical Left Bans Fried Chicken in Harlem Calling It ‘Racist and Murder’

Radical Left Bans Fried Chicken in Harlem Calling It ‘Racist and Murder’

Posted by By Flagg Eagleton - Patriot Posted inSatirical Democrats Who Don't Exist In Nature
If you eat chicken, you're either racist or you don't care about chickens.
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Biden Says He ‘Loves Children More Than Mr. Rogers’

Biden Says He ‘Loves Children More Than Mr. Rogers’

Posted by By Flagg Eagleton - Patriot Posted inBiden Satire For Delusional Trumpsters To Hate
"I can reach out to children from my basement!"
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So Long Great Pumpkin: Biden Bans Charlie Brown Halloween Special

So Long Great Pumpkin: Biden Bans Charlie Brown Halloween Special

Posted by By Flagg Eagleton - Patriot Posted inDeep State Satire with 2 Olives, Satirical Powers Of An Orange Imbecile
President Trump has removed, “It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown” from the airwaves. 
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Biden Proposes $50M in Reparations for Each Separated Migrant Child

Biden Proposes $50M in Reparations for Each Separated Migrant Child

Posted by By Flagg Eagleton - Patriot Posted inSilly Tater Satire
Their families will also be offered immediate citizenship.
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