Radical Left Bans Fried Chicken in Harlem Calling It ‘Racist and Murder’

A furor was witnessed yesterday in downtown Harlem at several chicken restaurants. It transpires that the radical left was up to their old tricks again and stopping normal people from getting their daily meal fried chicken.

The oddballs who claim that chicken is slave food and that it is also barbaric to eat chicken in this day and age, by calling it racist and murder, has got to be the wildest thing the radical left has ever said publicly.

The leader known only as, “Trigger,” was at the front chanting, “chicken is slavery, slavery is murder, murder is chicken, chicken is slavery!”

The folks were just scratching their heads as to what the hell were they trying to convey? Nobody had a clue so, I took my smug ass, down to Harlem to meet Trigger to explain this ludicrous public show of stupidity!

I asked Trigger, who was wearing black lipstick a Jesus Mary chain teeshirt, and a wild crow’s nest hairstyle, why the attention-seeking exercise? Who thought of the idea that, chicken is slave food and that it is also murder?

Here is what he said,

“I think it’s fairly reasonable to assume that chicken was what our ancestors fed slaves on and, that the red meat with the most vitamins were always saved for the slave owners families.

Did you know four billion chickens have to die each year so you can keep this barbaric factory process going, by keeping people in their chicken chattels just for a cheap meal? You need to open your minds and heart, to see it for what it really is.

It’s an industry for the slave food meal deal! If you eat chicken, you’re either racist or you don’t care about chickens so that makes you a murderer too, hundred percent.

And, we are going to close you down!”

As soon as I finished my brief on the spot interview, there was the sound of smashing KFC buckets. This was just to help validate their fantastical democratic socialist point of view.

The police showed up but no arrests were made but lots of news reporters were present.

No more chicken in Harlem.