You’ve seen the memes. You’ve read the stories. You’ve researched the evidence. Like most patriotic Americans, you know that the Clinton Crime Syndicate is real and that the monsters at the top, a former US president and his political powerhouse of a wife, murdered dozens and dozens of people. It’s called “Clinton Body Bags,” and it’s the topic of a fact-finding commission’s latest focus.
The Civic United National Trust Society, a non-partisan watchdog group and polling company this outlet has relied on many times for accurate information, put a team of experts on the case. After six years, their researchers believe they found enough evidence to send the issue to law enforcement for a full investigation. “We plan to petition both the FBI and Homeland Security, as we believe several of these instances were hits on international targets that could put US diplomacy in jeopardy,” said Senior Analyst Joe Barron.
According to the commission’s report, the Clintons use murder so often that the “Bags” list, which has 221 names on it, is likely short by more than 500 people. That means they killed thousands.
The FBI says it has no intention of investigating the findings, regardless of what the report says. “Your commission is a satirical right-wing think tank and this doesn’t really warrant wasting our time. Please stop emailing us,” said Assistant Director of Public Nuisance Cases, Art Tubolls. His willingness to blow off the notion that the power couple should be looked into suggests that they already got to the FBI’s higher-ups. That’s just a crying shame.