Anheuser Busch is desperate to save its woke brand, Bud Light. Our sources tell us that the latest scam the company is trying to pull is having famous celebrities seen in public holding cans of the tainted product.

The company’s latest attempt failed, however, when singer/songwriter Oliver Anthony turned down a $100 million offer to be seen at the Super Bowl with a Bud Light. “They said I only had to hold it for ten minutes. I told them my dignity isn’t for sale,” Anthony allegedly told the ad execs.

“You probably remember the big “scandal” surrounding Kid Rock,” said Bud Light Spokesmodel Joe Barron, “He wasn’t just seen with a Bud Light. He was paid handsomely. His act with Dana White and ‘forgiving’ the brand cost us a fortune. Oliver wanted nothing to do with it. We’re not denying it. We’re accepting it and moving on.”

Anheuser Busch will probably just scrap the whole Budweiser brand and come up with something else now that nobody buys any of it anymore. It only makes sense.

ALLOD Entertainment Correspondelator caught up with Chris Lunsford, the man behind Oliver Anthony Music, and found that he’s definitely never been offered that kind of money for ten minutes of his time and that he would have “jumped out of his pants and blown Jesus” for that kind of an opportunity.

“Apparently, Flagg, you stooge, you had another conversation with a fake account and just published whatever they said,” Newhole reported, “You’re an idiot.”

Newhole received a referral to Human Resources for her comments but refused to go. We’re still not gonna fire her. She brings Taco Bell. God Bless America.



  1. I’m a fresh fan of this primo website serving up choice content. The creative owner clearly has got the magic touch keeping visitors plugged in. I’m jazzed to be aboard and looking forward to more dynamite content!

  2. … [Trackback]

    […] Read More on that Topic: […]

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *