Well hello, little Miss Fancy Pants.
If you’ve been in Dearborn, Michigan within the last week, or seen the videos all over the lamestream media, you’d already know that the annual Afghanistan refugee festival is in full effect right now. Would you perhaps like a nice handful of fried flies or a bowl of thick okra and wheatgrass soup?
Among other celebrities burka-ing it up and doing the Funky Fatwa dance, like Phil Collins, Taylor Swift, and mini hot dog entrepreneur Joe Barron, vice president Kamala Harris was there, boogying it up with the locals. Isn’t that swell?
Harris reportedly hopped on Air Force Two to be at the event, packing light, with only a tangerine sari, packets of A+ blood, (Harris herself is B-), and several dozen boxes of Trojan chocolate-flavored condoms in her baggage. The plane also transported her personal secretary Missy Southard.
The reasoning behind the senoritas sexy sojourn fell under American-Muslammic relations, with Kamala being the obvious choice for good will ambassador. The cost of the trip, including a week’s stay at the Muhammad Ali Grand hotel with appropriate room and male escort services, food, gallons of drink, and rental of a 2021 Lamborghini with mag tires is included in the recently passed stimulus bill. A mere 81 million dollars. Plus tax.
Now if that isn’t a falafel-busting way to spend those child tax credits, i’d be hard pressed to think of another that gives the same sense of warmth.
The Lady Harris’s hummus huffing homecoming is set to last through the extent of the month, ending at just nearly Christmas, when she will return to Washington briefly to retrieve her diamond earrings, and then head out once again, this time, to Las Vegas, Nevada to spend the high holidays with family, friends, and Mini-Kiss.
It’s a good season to be vice president. Salaam.
