The civil rights and charitable National Association for the Advancement of Colored People has worked tirelessly for decades to back strong leaders and impressive role models for the mainly African American community.  This year, they’ve chosen by unanimous decision of the board, to recognize Vice Presidential candidate Kamala Harris as their Woman of the Year, an honor highly prized in the world of black achievement.

“According to my magic pickled goat penis mobile, I will be nominated next year for ‘most cray Trump ho.”

The NAACP’s Spokespazizzle Joe Barron told media outlets that Harris embodies the sheer power, drive, and outgoing attitude of success that provides a strong and proud role model for black youth worldwide, despite the childish and laughably racist commentary by absolute twaddletards on the political right.

“What you’re finding currently across the gamut of the Trump-handicapped post-lobotomy right wing, is the idea that Mrs. Harris is, somehow, not ‘black.’  While the irony of a few thousand pasty white senior citizens who spent decades hiding behind dumpsters when a person of color came within fifty feet suddenly becoming racial experts isn’t lost on us, it is a troubling example of exactly how stupid your average teabagging Trumper is.  While we are rewarding Kamala for her achievements and attitude, we take delight in the triggering that this award will cause to the wheezing atrophied ventricles of the racist right.”

Previous recipients of the bestowed honor include Oprah Winfrey, pop-stars Brandy and Beyonce, Oprah Winfrey, Halle Berry, Shield actress CCH Pounder, Oprah Winfrey, and host Wayne Brady, whose uncommon levels of estrogen qualify him as a woman by technicality.  Harris is the first honoree in an even-numbered year to not be named “Oprah.”

Sonequa Martin-Green of Star Trek Discovery is a strong contender for next year. She’s very popular with the green-blooded types.

As the withered old albino pumpkins in the Trump camp rant and rave about the Vice Presidential contender not being black enough for their usual stereotypical racist masturbation fantasies, the election looms, with Harris soon to square off against Mike Pence, possibly the most alabaster human being since Lucille Ball was covered with flour in that “I Love Lucy” episode.  But as far as awards go, Trump’s cotton-topped number two hasn’t even won so much as a free sample of mayonnaise.


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