When he heard Toby Keith had passed, Jason Aldean immediately began organizing a candlelight vigil and sing along in his memory.

“The first thing I thought about was honoring Toby,” said Aldean, “I couldn’t believe it when Brooks called and asked if he could play. He said he didn’t know any of Toby’s songs but that he’s be happy to bust out Achy Breaky Heart in his honor.”

Aldean says the request was so bizarre that he thought maybe Garth was trolling him, but alas, he was serious.

“You don’t understand what it’s like,” said Entertainment Analystical Specialist Joe Barron, “the fictitiout versions of these people are morons. They’re worse than the real things, and in some cases, that’s saying something.”

Barron may be on to something. We often get questioned on the validity of stoking the flames of geriatric tater hate, but honestly, we can’t help it at this point. it’s hilarious. They think Garth Brooks is broke with no friends.

So while we haven’t asked Whoopi to chime in and there’s no plans to see any of them on Roseanne’s new show that’s been ready to air for a little over a year now, we are fairly certain that in the ALLOF Garth Brooks Multiverse, this is very possible.

Boycott Bud Light. God Bless America.

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