One if the longest running educational programs for children is getting a muy grande upgrade. Thanks to congressional Democrats, the bill set forth to help boost the economy this month contains a generous grant of $500 million to provide a version of the popular public broadcasting system fixture “Sesame Street” entirely in the Spanish language.
Test audiences responded favorably to the “Tickle Me Burrito” segment.
The nuevo programa, whose title translates in American to “Jalepeno Avenue”, is set to debut early next year, with ratings estimated to hit huge numbers in Latino-dominated areas of the country. The show is a direct mirror of it’s English counterpart, featuring a walking, talking chicken, (“El Pollo Grande”), a friendly pair of homosexual cohabitators (“Berto and Ernesto”), and a comedic angry American character who lives lazy and constantly complaining in a garbage can. (“Oscar Del Gringo.”)
PBS head producer Jose Barron says the program will strive to reach the same levels of educational excellence that it’s Caucasian counterpart features.
“Choo know, thees show is for the leetle putos out there, the Mexicanos, the Salvadoreanos, Guatemalinos, all of them living in this great, great country of Los Estados Unidos. Many of these countries, they do no having good school and learning for the ninos in Espanol on television, mostly because we use much money from government for fumando la mota and taking long siestas in middle of day. Also buying radios for music playing outside of taco truck. Ay ya ya YA! Is very nice for Senora Pelosi to give free money for the little cacahuates learning our language. Gracias, chupadores!”
Geraldo Rivera has already disguised himself as a little soccer boy for an inside investigation.
The program will also include guest hosting spots, with celebrities George Lopez, Selma Hayek, and Mexican rap star 2000-Peso already signed for April of 2021. In a statement celebrating the taxpayer funding of the programming, representitive Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez described the handout as : “A wonderful gift to the wonderful people that racist-ass Trump puts down.”
Looks like America is headed for just another Tequila Sunrise.
Flagg Eagleton is the son of an American potato farmer and a patriot. After spending 4 years in the Navy and 7 on welfare picking himself up by the bootstraps, Flagg finally got his HVAC certificate and is hard at work keeping the mobile homes of Tallahassee at a comfy 83 degrees.
