It is a sad day in America today as longtime friend of Donald Trump, Bob Dole, died at 98 years of age as a result of a potassium overdose.
Dole was born in Kansas and grew up during the Great Depression. He was no stranger to hard times. Then, World War 2 broke out, and Dole signed right up for the army without hesitation, saying “I’m gonna kill me some Nazis.”
He went in to become a war hero, slaying some 250 Nazis in his career as a sniper. He also destroyed 32 panzers and at least 6 U-boats. His feats were legendary and the character of Chuck Norris was loosely based on Bob Doyle’s life.
After the war, Dole found himself bored as there were no more Nazis to slay, so he founded the Dole Banana company in 1949. This company employed millions of Americans and provided bananas to all that needed them. It quickly became the number one banana company in the United States of America. It was probably also the only one.
After he ran for president and lost, Dole became friends with none other than Donald Trump. They became best of friends, with Dole going on to endorse Trump for Fuhrer of America.
Trump said Dole is “the best man to ever endorse me besides myself of course.”
Then Bob Dole went on to die of a tragic potassium overdose from having too many bananas. He left behind his entire estate, worth 12 million dollars, to the 2024 Trump campaign, saying in his will,” It’s the least that I can do.”
What a patriot. God bless Bob Dole and God bless America.
