In a sweeping new executive order instituted by President Joe Biden, electric cars are going to finally be ready for their close-ups
Seated in his executive chair at the executive desk in the oval office, President Biden signed executive order E6161-A, which, intended to go into effect within a month, will shut down production of all gasoline-only based vehicles and shift the creation of electric powered modes of transportation.
Surrounded by electric vehicle carmakers, high level executives, and, for some reason, the surviving members of “The Sex Pistols”, Biden spoke briefly, pressing that his order will change the fabric of the nation by the year 2024.
“In 2024, when we are all ready to elect Miss Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez to high office and are buying robomice as toys for our superintelligent cats, our country will prosper greatly from putting around in our full-sized electric transformers. I’ve already ordered my Rodimus Prime. Have you?”
Sandra Batt of Conservatives Unwilling Never, Thank You isn’t at all happy about the future.
“I, and the rest of C.U.N.T.Y. don’t want a free and beautiful emission free future. We want to pollute for our kids and their kids. Screw em all! We can’t afford no lectric cars on our social security! That’s why socialism doesn’t work!”
Batt and her cohorts were also present at the signing ceremony, but we’re escorted out after several of them loudly farted on photos of rainbows.
