Bud Light sales are down more than 80 percent this morning after Kid Rock let it be known that he really dislikes their use of a trans person in marketing campaigns.
In response, Augustus Anheuser III personally fired the entire marketing department at the company.
“We have a very particular retail customer base,” said Anheuser, “they don’t like wokeness. They don’t agree that they should have to accept immoral people and their lifestyles.”
Former marketing director Joe Barron says he doesn’t regret the decision. “Every company does a pride thing. These idiots are all jumping to Coors when Coors started it. They’ve been advocating for LGBTQ rights for decades.”
That doesn’t matter, according to the vibe across the internet. If you’re a real American who loves guns and God and thinks Kid Rock is cool even though he writes shitty music, you’re probably in the process of switching beers. Michelob light is a great alternative, as is Natural Light.
“We’re getting a new marketing campaign up and running,” says Anheuser,” we’re considering asking Kid Rock to come aboard if he can forgive our misguided past.”
Kid Rock’s spokesman, Art Tubolls, said Kid is more than eager to entertain the notion if the price is right. God Bless America.
Its the WHOLE company! Drank Bud for 45 yrs. No more!!
Man, you’ve been a drunkard for THAT long? Shocking how you haven’t crashed a car yet! Also, THIS SITE IS SATIRE!
should have been a white claw commercial not a bud. Well no more bud-light for me!! you sick bastards!!
I spiked the local water supply with bud-light so unless if you want to get dehydrated, you’re screwed…AND THIS IS SATIRE!
I stopped drinking Bud years ago when I learned the Lizard People owned a majority stock in the company! Wake up people!!!11!
I refuse to let the woke MOB!!!! take away my American (never China) beer and hand it over to the far-left extremist transterrorists!! F— THAT!!!!
I thought Michelob Light was an Anheiser-Busch beer too?
Fruity is correct. I also put TMNL (teenage mutant ninja lizards) in the rivers. Be afraid. THIS IS SATIRE (but fruity is a genius)
I do not know what bud light had on there mind. I have drank Anheuser-Busch products for years. Sorry to see it come to this. I’m finished!!!!!
Great! Now quit smoking and watching fox and maybe you will become a reliable member of society! THIS SITE IS SATIRE!
How did he do it from the grave? Augustus Anheuser III passed away on April 13, 2010, at the age of 72.
Dunning-Kruger-Times.com is a subsidiary of the “America’s Last Line of Defense” network of parody, satire, and tomfoolery, or as Snopes called it before they lost their war on satire: Junk News
Well… to be fair… snopes is no more of a credible fact source than Don Lemon
I agree, I don’t know who is worse, Don Lemon or Joe Biden when comparing to Snopes.
Politifact rules because they have both sides dunked on.
No, He’s still alive and very active in his company. Don’t know what person you are referring to, his father August Anheuser Jr. died in 1989 at the age of 90.
I am not a beer snob, but American beer, especially “light” beer, sucks. European beer is far and away better. Even beer from Thailand or Japan is better.
Ditto!
Anhueser-Busch is owned by InBev which I think is a Belgium company. InBev owns numerous European Brands including Becks, Lowenbrau and Stella Artois. They also own some Mexican brands that were enjoying some success in the US market including Corona and Modelo. They also own several beers that were formerly microbrews including Shock Top, Red Hook and Goose Island. In my opinion all of the beers are way better than Bud Light. They also probably earn a higher profit margin for InBev. InBev is going to laugh all the way to the bank if people switch from their low margin Bud Light swill to one of their more premium brands so we need to boycott ALL InBev products.
At this point you may as well boycott all liquid! BOYCOTT PEPSI AND RC COLA AND ROOT BEER! AAAAAAAA! This is satire!
holy shit I lost brain cells reading these comments
Same! I now have -2016 braincells 😀
Leave it to a company that makes shitty beer to judge shitty music. Ever since they started calling it An American Beer instead of the King of Beers, given it’s no longer an American owned beer company I stopped drinking it. It’ swill anyways and I’d much rather drink craft beer than touch their shitty beer.
Stop being drunk for once and then you would know that THIS SITE IS SATIRE!
Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha! Now to go fish/troll some home fries. Great job, ALLOD.
This entire article is bogus. None of this- I repeat… NONE of this article is true. AB hasn’t fired anyone and, in fact, doubled down on the decision. Also, the Anheuser guy you quote is not even alive.
You have not learned the definition of satire yet, huh?
More that idiots who don’t read past the headline accept satire as truth
The “BEER” industry has been going downhill from the time they started putting fruit flavors in it. Keep It Simple Stupid! Water, Grain, Hops and Yeast.
Do you want it roasted above some feces too? Because this site is satire baybeeeee!!!!
Yuengling lager from now on. They’re big GOP donors too.
GOP? Getting Over Porn? Impossible! All of you like watching trump (attempting to, since he isn’t president anymore) screwing america! This site is satire!
Pingback: ¿Anheuser-Busch despidió al equipo de marketing de Budweiser en medio de la controversia?
Pingback: Did Anheuser-Busch fire Budweiser’s marketing team amid controversy?
No more Bud in my house ever again! Tired of stupid commercials and stupid politics. Switch to something else, teach the “Bud woke” a lesson. Our soldiers are fighting wars and coming home to this crap. A disgrace!
I will print a picture of the bud-light logo to every single picture in your house because THIS SITE IS SATIRE!
LMFAO!!! Man, you anti-woke, free speech, Merica!,.. folks sure are a sensitive bunch. No, they didn’t fire their marketing team even though most of these folks will swallow that store faster than a 2 bit whore. It’s just another wet conspiracy dream of those on the extreme, beyond crazy right wingers… But, please, please go on with your bad self. It helps to continue to expose just how out there and truly anti-freedom, anti-democratic, and just plain ole anti-American you really are.
You do have a good point. I am unsure if you know that this site is satire though.
I saw a can of Bud Light a couple nights ago and next thing I know I was sucking 29 dicks.
Same! Truly crazy 😀
Thank God journalism isn’t dead, thanks to intrepid reporters like Mr. Eagleton. Only your stubborn commitment to the truth could find out The Rockster’s affect on the beer sales for this very morning.
On a related note, our Tallahassee mobile home jumped up to 90 degrees. That’s American Fahrenheit, none of that socialist Centigrade. Ethyl, my wife, is running around in her underwear and that’s way more skin than the dogs can handle. Can you fix it for us?
Comments are gold lol.
Michelob and Natural are made by A-B. Do your research. I think this is a gaslight article. I don’t believe A-B are changing their tune, and I don’t think Kid Rock is either.
This is pandering. The owner knew what they were doing. Don’t tell me this went without his knowledge. Am I that stupid. And no, us “idiots” don’t course drink Coors. I switched to German beer. I’d rather pay the price, then drink balls.
Yes you are that stupid! Also, liquid balls would probably a hot seller.
Michelob light is an Anheuser Bush product also so the article is just a satire and disinformation campaign.
A-B has been a bad actor for decades. They are the number one opponent of bottle/can deposit laws which have been very effective in reducing trash along the highways. About 90% of my ditch cleanup trash has Bud Light or Bud or some other weekass A-B brand on it. That doesn’t speak about the customers they attract. A-B, Nike and the other woke companies, pandering to a very small group of deviants will get my business.
WOKE! WOKE! IF I SAY WOKE ENOUGH TIMES I MAY ACTUALLY SOMETHING OF NOTE! THIS SITE IS SATIRE!
I have never pushed my “White-Straightness”, nor do I fly a “I’m straight” flag. I’m comfortable with the LBGTQ+ community. My wife’s Uncle is Queer and my cousin is Bisexual. I love them both. When I worked at Kaiser Aluminum I worked alongside almost every kind and color of person. Some were vary colorful and a lot of fun with great attitude about who they are. But I do have a problem with companies that seem to think they need to push the LBGTQ+ life style. Like I said I don’t feel a need to push or celebrate my Straight & White lifestyle on others. Why did Obama give the LBGTQ+ group Pride Month? Even God and Christmas didn’t get a month. I also don’t believe it’s safe to be teaching sexual behavior to kids under the 7th grade. I read some of the school’s questionnaires being given out to kids of young ages and it was shocking. One just recently felt like it was trying to make you think you’re not supposed to be who you are ( if you are straight, your thinking wrong.) A young child wouldn’t understand this. It would probably leave them confused. It was shaming you for being straight. That was clear to me.
It’s alright to celebrate a person who is doing something special and OK for “Him, Her” to announce they are LBGTQ+ or of some Race if they like. But the Race and LBGTQ+ are being pushed to a Higher Plain than the rest of us and are getting notoriety by being different from the rest of us.
Please be careful of what you publish and lets slowdown all this flag-waving that just divides us. Thanks, Larry
Larry? Are you mentally, ok? Because your comment reads like a schizophrenic rambling. I once clicked on a Daniel Larson video and he was still less crazy than you.
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SEO-оптимизация сайта SEO — это комплекс действий непосредственно на сайте и вне его, необходимых для повышения позиций ресурса в поисковой органической выдаче Google по релевантным запросам, и как результат — его видимости целевой аудитории. Мы разделяем SEO на два этапа — это SEO-оптимизация и SEO-продвижение. Ведь без технически правильной SEO-оптимизации дальнейшее SEO-продвижение невозможно. При качественном SEO-продвижении, ваш сайт будет находиться на первой странице поисковиков, а значит — получать больше трафика и целевых действий от посетителей. Для сравнения, веб-ресурсы, которые не оптимизируют и не продвигают для поисковых систем, зачастую вообще не отображаются в выдаче и соответственно не имеют органических переходов. При формировании поисковой выдачи по запросу используется сложная формула сортировки, учитывающая десятки параметров. Алгоритмы ранжирования регулярно обновляются, дополняются и модернизируются с единой целью — обеспечить максимально релевантные ответы на запросы пользователей. Точный алгоритм построения выдачи результатов не разглашается работниками поисковиков, сообщаются лишь общие требования и критерии заточенного под SEO ресурса, позволяющие попасть в ТОП (первую десятку результатов). При этом каждый новый апдейт Google ужесточает правила для игроков на рынке маркетинга и добавляет работы SEO-специалистам и владельцам бизнесов. Побеждают сильнейшие — те, кто готов адаптироваться и постоянно работать над веб-ресурсом. Но в качестве вознаграждения — постоянный бесплатный органический трафик, повышение позиций и удержание ТОПа. На практике, без активных работ по поисковой оптимизации и продвижению практически невозможно вывести сайт на первую страницу выдачи в высококонкурентных коммерческих тематиках, даже если его контент и техническая реализация будут идеальными.
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Uncover the Top-Rated Air Conditioning Repair Service in the Heart
of Summerlin
In the heart of Summerlin, where temperatures escalate, a trustworthy air conditioning system
isn’t just a luxury—it’s a necessity. That’s why picking the best air conditioning repair service is crucial for keeping a
cozy and energy-efficient home. At Best Summerlin Air Conditioning Repair, we excel
in delivering top-notch solutions that meet all your cooling needs.
Why Select Best Summerlin Air Conditioning Repair?
Expertise: Our team consists of knowledgeable technicians
who are proficient in the latest air conditioning technologies.
They possess the skills to detect and rectify any issues promptly, ensuring your system functions
smoothly.
Reliability: We understand the importance of air conditioning problems, especially during extreme weather.
Our quick response times and effective repair services mean you
won’t be left in distress for long.
Comprehensive Maintenance: Regular maintenance is key
to avoiding major breakdowns and lengthening the life of your air conditioning system.
We offer thorough maintenance plans to keep your unit in top condition.
Exceptional Customer Service: At Best Summerlin Air Conditioning Repair, we focus on your
satisfaction. Our team is committed to providing open communication, transparent pricing, and customized solutions to meet your particular needs.
Affordability: Quality service shouldn’t cost a fortune.
We offer competitive pricing and clear quotes, ensuring you get
the greatest value for your investment.
Warranty Assurance: We back the quality of our work. Our services come with guarantees, giving you confidence
and assurance in our repairs.
Emergency Services: Air conditioning emergencies can occur at any time.
That’s why we offer emergency repair services to
handle your urgent needs immediately.
Reputation: Our dedication to excellence is reflected in the glowing reviews and recommendations from
our content customers. Count on us to deliver dependable and potent air conditioning
solutions.
Benefit from the Best in Air Conditioning Repair
Don’t let air conditioning issues disrupt your comfort. Choose Best Summerlin Air Conditioning Repair
for dependable, efficient, and cost-effective solutions.
Get in touch with us today to arrange a service or
learn more about how we can improve your home’s cooling system.
Discover the Leading HVAC Repair Service in the Heart of Phoenix
In the center of Phoenix, where temperatures climb, a dependable HVAC system isn’t just
a luxury—it’s a necessity. That’s why selecting the best HVAC repair service is crucial for maintaining a cozy and energy-efficient home.
At Best HVAC Repair Phoenix, we pride ourselves on delivering excellent solutions that meet all your cooling and
heating needs.
Why Select Best HVAC Repair Phoenix?
Expertise: Our team is made up of experienced technicians who are proficient in the latest HVAC technologies.
They possess the skills to identify and resolve any issues promptly, ensuring your system runs smoothly.
Reliability: We understand the urgency of HVAC
problems, especially during extreme weather. Our prompt
response times and effective repair services mean you won’t be left in disarray for long.
Comprehensive Maintenance: Regular maintenance is key to preventing major breakdowns and extending the life of
your HVAC system. We offer extensive maintenance plans
to keep your unit in top condition.
Exceptional Customer Service: At Best HVAC Repair Phoenix, we value your
satisfaction. Our team is dedicated to providing transparent communication, honest pricing,
and personalized solutions to meet your individual needs.
Affordability: Quality service shouldn’t break
the bank. We offer competitive pricing and clear quotes, ensuring you get
the greatest value for your money.
Warranty Assurance: We back the quality of our work.
Our services come with guarantees, giving you peace of mind and certainty in our repairs.
Emergency Services: HVAC emergencies can happen at any time.
That’s why we offer around-the-clock repair services to
tackle your urgent needs immediately.
Reputation: Our devotion to excellence is reflected in the favorable reviews and recommendations from our content customers.
Rely on us to deliver reliable and efficient
HVAC solutions.
Enjoy the Best in HVAC Repair
Don’t let HVAC issues disrupt your comfort. Opt for Best
HVAC Repair Phoenix for dependable, productive,
and cost-effective solutions. Get in touch with
us today to book a service or find out more about how we can improve your home’s heating and cooling systems.
Here’s the revised article for Best Las Vegas HVAC Contractor using
spintax to generate at least 1,000 unique
versions:
Explore the Premier HVAC Contractor in the Heart of
Las Vegas
In the center of Las Vegas, where temperatures climb, a trustworthy HVAC system isn’t just a luxury—it’s a necessity.
That’s why picking the top HVAC contractor is crucial for maintaining
a cozy and energy-efficient home. At Best Las Vegas HVAC Contractor, we pride ourselves
on delivering top-notch solutions that meet all your cooling and heating needs.
Why Choose Best Las Vegas HVAC Contractor?
Expertise: Our team comprises skilled technicians who are adept in the latest HVAC
technologies. They possess the skills to identify and resolve any issues promptly, ensuring your system functions smoothly.
Reliability: We understand the importance of HVAC problems, especially during extreme weather.
Our rapid response times and competent repair services mean you won’t be left in discomfort for long.
Comprehensive Maintenance: Regular maintenance is key to warding
off major breakdowns and extending the life of your
HVAC system. We offer extensive maintenance plans to keep your unit in top condition.
Exceptional Customer Service: At Best Las Vegas HVAC Contractor,
we focus on your satisfaction. Our team is dedicated to providing
transparent communication, straightforward pricing, and tailored solutions to meet your specific needs.
Affordability: Quality service shouldn’t break the bank.
We offer affordable pricing and transparent quotes, ensuring you get the
most value for your spend.
Warranty Assurance: We stand by the quality of our work.
Our services come with warranties, giving you peace of mind and certainty in our
repairs.
Emergency Services: HVAC emergencies can arise at any time.
That’s why we offer around-the-clock repair services to tackle your urgent needs immediately.
Reputation: Our commitment to excellence is evident in the glowing reviews
and referrals from our happy customers. Trust us to deliver reliable and efficient
HVAC solutions.
Experience the Best in HVAC Services
Don’t let HVAC issues interfere with your comfort.
Choose Best Las Vegas HVAC Contractor for trustworthy, productive, and cost-effective solutions.
Get in touch with us today to schedule a service or discover more about how we can enhance
your home’s heating and cooling systems.
When it comes to installing a tankless water heater in your home, choosing
the right plumbing company is crucial. In Phoenix, AZ, Tankless Water Heaters Phoenix stands out as the best choice for this important job.
With their expertise, commitment to quality, and customer-centric approach, they ensure that your tankless water heater installation is
seamless and efficient.
Energy-Efficient Solutions:
Tankless water heaters are known for their energy
efficiency, and Tankless Water Heaters Phoenix specializes in providing the
most eco-friendly options. Whether you choose an electric or gas
model, their team will help you select the perfect unit that saves energy and
reduces your utility bills.
Expertise in Instantaneous Hot Water Systems:
One of the key benefits of tankless water heaters is their ability to provide instantaneous hot water on demand.
The professionals at Tankless Water Heaters Phoenix have the knowledge and experience to
install these systems correctly, ensuring you have continuous access to hot water whenever you need it.
Space-Saving and Compact Designs:
For homeowners in Phoenix with limited space, the compact design of tankless water heaters is
a significant advantage. Tankless Water Heaters Phoenix will help you choose and install a model that fits perfectly in your home, maximizing your space while
providing efficient hot water heating.
Advanced Temperature Control:
With advanced temperature control features, tankless water heaters offer
precise hot water management. The experts at Tankless Water Heaters Phoenix will ensure that your system is
installed with the proper temperature settings, giving you
complete control over your hot water usage.
Eco-Friendly and Sustainable:
As a company committed to sustainability, Tankless Water Heaters Phoenix promotes eco-friendly tankless water heaters that contribute to
a greener environment. By choosing them for your installation, you’re making a responsible choice for the planet.
Professional Venting and Installation:
Proper venting is essential for the safe operation of gas tankless water heaters.
The team at Tankless Water Heaters Phoenix is well-versed in the correct venting techniques and will ensure that your system is installed safely and efficiently.
Comprehensive Maintenance and Lifespan:
To ensure the longevity of your tankless water heater, regular maintenance
is key. Tankless Water Heaters Phoenix offers comprehensive maintenance services to keep your system running smoothly for years to come.
Conclusion:
When it comes to installing a tankless water heater
in Phoenix, AZ, Tankless Water Heaters Phoenix is
the best plumbing company for the job. With their expertise in energy-efficient, eco-friendly,
and compact systems, along with their commitment to quality installation and maintenance, you can trust that your tankless water heater will provide reliable hot water for your home.
Choose Tankless Water Heaters Phoenix for a seamless
and efficient installation experience.
Discover the Top-Rated Heating & Cooling Repair
Service in the Las Vegas Area
In the center of Las Vegas, where temperatures rise, a dependable heating and cooling system isn’t just a luxury—it’s a necessity.
That’s why selecting the finest repair service is crucial for keeping a pleasant and energy-efficient home.
At Best Las Vegas Heating & Cooling, we are proud to
offer delivering excellent solutions that meet all your temperature
control needs.
Why Select Best Las Vegas Heating & Cooling?
Expertise: Our team comprises knowledgeable technicians who are adept in the latest heating and cooling technologies.
They possess the skills to detect and resolve any issues efficiently,
ensuring your system functions smoothly.
Reliability: We understand the critical nature of temperature control
problems, especially during intense weather. Our quick response times and competent repair services mean you
won’t be left in discomfort for long.
Comprehensive Maintenance: Regular maintenance is key to preventing major
breakdowns and prolonging the life of your heating and cooling system.
We offer comprehensive maintenance plans to keep your unit in prime condition.
Exceptional Customer Service: At Best Las Vegas Heating &
Cooling, we focus on your satisfaction. Our team is devoted to providing open communication,
transparent pricing, and customized solutions to meet your individual needs.
Affordability: Quality service shouldn’t break the bank.
We offer competitive pricing and clear quotes, ensuring
you get the best for your investment.
Warranty Assurance: We stand by the quality of our work.
Our services come with guarantees, giving you peace of mind and reliability in our repairs.
Emergency Services: Temperature control emergencies can happen at any time.
That’s why we offer 24/7 repair services to tackle your urgent needs swiftly.
Reputation: Our devotion to excellence is reflected in the positive reviews and referrals from our happy customers.
Count on us to deliver reliable and effective heating and cooling solutions.
Enjoy the Best in Heating & Cooling Repair
Don’t let temperature control issues interfere with your comfort.
Opt for Best Las Vegas Heating & Cooling for reliable,
efficient, and cost-effective solutions. Get in touch with us today
to arrange a service or discover more about how we can enhance your home’s heating and cooling systems.
Discover the Leading HVAC Repair Service in the Summerlin Area
In the core of Summerlin, where temperatures soar, a reliable HVAC system isn’t just a luxury—it’s a necessity.
That’s why selecting the best HVAC repair service is crucial for maintaining a cozy and energy-efficient home.
At Best Summerlin HVAC Repair, we pride ourselves on delivering excellent solutions that meet all your cooling and heating
needs.
Why Opt for Best Summerlin HVAC Repair?
Expertise: Our team is made up of experienced technicians who are adept in the latest HVAC
technologies. They possess the skills to identify and
fix any issues promptly, ensuring your system operates smoothly.
Reliability: We understand the importance of HVAC problems, especially during extreme weather.
Our quick response times and efficient repair services mean you won’t
be left in discomfort for long.
Comprehensive Maintenance: Regular maintenance is key to warding off major breakdowns
and lengthening the life of your HVAC system.
We offer extensive maintenance plans to keep your unit in prime condition.
Exceptional Customer Service: At Best Summerlin HVAC Repair, we focus
on your satisfaction. Our team is devoted to providing clear communication, transparent pricing, and
personalized solutions to meet your individual needs.
Affordability: Quality service shouldn’t cost a fortune. We offer
reasonable pricing and straightforward quotes, ensuring you get
the most value for your investment.
Warranty Assurance: We support the quality of our work.
Our services come with guarantees, giving you confidence and assurance in our repairs.
Emergency Services: HVAC emergencies can happen at any time.
That’s why we offer 24/7 repair services to tackle your urgent needs immediately.
Reputation: Our dedication to excellence is manifested in the favorable reviews
and recommendations from our content customers.
Trust us to deliver dependable and potent HVAC solutions.
Benefit from the Best in HVAC Repair
Don’t let HVAC issues interfere with your comfort. Choose Best Summerlin HVAC Repair for dependable, efficient, and economical
solutions. Reach out to us today to book a service or find out more about how we can improve
your home’s heating and cooling systems.
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