Triggered Tim Walz, the man who loves tampons, can no longer go to The Big House in Michigan. He flipped off the fans, and that won’t stand in Wolverine country.
“He can’t just come here and do that,” said Michigan Director of Football Stadium Operations Joe Barron, “It’s in our bylaws.”
We looked into the bylaws and found that the claim was mostly if not completely bogus, unfortunately, but that doesn’t really matter. We’ve gone past the second sentence, which means everyone dumb enough to believe this nonsense has already moved on to a shiny ad.
“It’s not fair,” said HankNPat White from Wichita, “Every time we try to read on we get sidetracked by another poll asking us how much we hate Kamala. We have no choice but to click. Then there’s those people with beans glued on them for some reason. Are we supposed to not find out why?”
Other colleges may follow suit, as Walz’s middle finger resonated across the country to idiots who didn’t care about the “grab her by the pussy” guy clutch their pearls.
And rightfully so. Amirite? They keep those pearls in the closet with the other costume jewelry and some wigs, so it only makes sense that they’re dressed like a woman when they cry like one. God Bless America.
