In a rare treat for this reporter, The Dunning-Kruger Times gets to report on something that might actually be worthwhile. The Washington Commanders are going back to their old helmets…but not their old name.

While the story itself is complete bullhonkey, as always, the idea is solid and shows that there isn’t always complete unity on the left. Many people celebrated the end of a name that half of Indigenous People found offensive. Unfortunately, they also celebrated the iconic helmet’s end without understanding its history.

“Redskins” had to go, for sure. But the helmet was drawn by a Blackfoot from Montana who is celebrated for it. The image itself was inspired by Chief White Calf, another Montana Blackfoot steeped in history. In a paragraph full of truth on a site full of fiction, there is a pending federal lawsuit to force the team to return to not only the helmet but the name.

What if there was a middle ground?

So for this story, because I can, the team’s Director of Non-Football Operations, Joe Barron, told us that the organization will switch back to “The Washington Football Team,” which also removes the reference to The Handmaid’s Tale from a team based in our nation’s capital of all places. “I actually kinda like it. Commanders never sounded like us.”

The team will also bring back the Chief White Calf helmet and rename their stadium in his honor. Because honestly, Bobby has enough stuff named after him.

Problem solved. God Bless America.