I’m more than certain you’re aware of who Stephen King is. The maker of nightmares for decades, from Carrie and Cujo to Mr. Mercedes and It. But now he’s facing his biggest villain yet. In the real world.
Bantam Publishing House, the tried and true publisher of fiction and non-fiction alike, has announced the dissolution of it’s partnership with the multi-million dollar author, citing a mountain of complaints about his newer material bigger than Christine’s garage.
“A whole lot of the lower-intelligence fans who plod through one of his books in the outhouse with their cousins have spoken,” says Bantam’s Head of Dipshittery Joe Barron. “They are really pissed about Holly Gibney and such. Really pissed.”
What Barron is referring to is the character from the Mr. Mercedes books who spun off into her own book recently, “Holly”. In the novel, Gibney is solving a mystery during the pandemic, supporting masks and vaccinations and making a few thinly veiled anti-Trump remarks.
Much of King’s audience sees this as “Wokeness”.
“That Holly book might as well have been written by the DNC,” says a guy who didn’t read, but heard about the book from his wife. “It’s yet another example of this garbage invading our lives!”
King himself, disagrees, and chuckles from his golden bathtub full of Mike’s Hard Lemonade and hundred dollar bills.
“If you actually paid attention to Holly’s character, you’d know she’s a bit of a neat freak and OCD about everything, so naturally, in a Pandemic, she’d wear a mask and get vaccinated. I mean, she’s not an idiot Trumper, afraid of her own shadow and dumber than a bag of hammers and dogshit.”
Former twice-impeached crybaby loser dickhead Donald Frump had no comment. For once.
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I’ll say to King what I say to ANY entertainer. You’re paid to entertain, not to lecture, proselytize, or otherwise push your own agenda on the audience. If you want to be an activist, don’t charge us $30 a pop to push your bulls*** on us.
Karma’s a beotch, beotch.
Someone forced you to buy Stephen King’s books? Hey this is America, ok? Freedom of speech is what we patriots fight for! SK is free to write whatever he wants and you are free to not buy it. PLUS, this site is satire not to be taken seriously. It seems you missed that.
Not sure Joe’s a big reader Bilbo – his response suggests he’s swimming in the shallow end of the gene pool.
( I.E You’re a fucking dumbass Joe )
P.S Are you the REAL Bill Baggins from Lord of the Rings ??!! ( Asking for a friend – a REALLLLY stupid friend. Name’s Joe )
Ha ha – JoeMojo what a bozo … it’s apocryphal satire Bro !
Stay strong Nong – Karma’s already been along.
P.S How MANY entertainers are listening to JoeMojo ? ( Asking for a friend – his name’s Stephen King.* )
* May not be true.
Hey I paid 30 bucks to see former twice-impeached crybaby loser dickhead Donald Frump and he lectured, proselytized and pushed his own agenda on the audience about how the election was stolen blah, blah, blah and how his tiny hands were struggling to whip out his tiny cock so that all of his dimwitted followers could stroke it.
Anyone got any advice on what to say to him ?
Stormy’s a beatch, beatch.
bumpy trumpy and dingdong biden….what a selection.
Stormy times ahead for conservative Liberals.
Trumpy giving ahead job in prison…for half the inmates. The other half get anal.
Toot toot – prepare the sphincter Trumpy – Bubba’s heading in !!
So I had this Joe schmoe come up to me ( not the sharpest tool in the shed, but I’d charged him 30 bucks so stick with me ) and start banging on about “being an activist blah, blah, blah” and I told him – any knuckle dragger using the word beotch and lacking the cojones to spell out BULLSHIT on a satirical website comments section is nothing more than a chicken fellating halfwit.
Got my Mojo back it did. ( not to mention the 30 bucks – shooting fish in a barrel with these inbred Redneck Trump retards ! )
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What a lying loser this outfit is, total garbage
Fascinating insight champ – let me guess…Donald Trump supporter ??
Truth hurts hey Don ?
H8rs gotta H8 Bro.
Stay strong …
No sign of fucktard bwerpipes … yet !
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Understanding COSC Validation and Its Importance in Watchmaking
COSC Validation and its Rigorous Criteria
COSC, or the Official Swiss Chronometer Testing Agency, is the official Switzerland testing agency that verifies the precision and accuracy of timepieces. COSC validation is a mark of quality craftsmanship and trustworthiness in chronometry. Not all timepiece brands pursue COSC accreditation, such as Hublot, which instead follows to its own strict criteria with movements like the UNICO, attaining similar precision.
The Art of Precision Timekeeping
The central mechanism of a mechanized watch involves the spring, which provides power as it loosens. This system, however, can be prone to environmental elements that may influence its accuracy. COSC-certified mechanisms undergo strict testing—over fifteen days in various circumstances (five positions, 3 temperatures)—to ensure their durability and dependability. The tests assess:
Typical daily rate accuracy between -4 and +6 seconds.
Mean variation, peak variation rates, and impacts of thermal changes.
Why COSC Certification Matters
For watch enthusiasts and connoisseurs, a COSC-validated timepiece isn’t just a item of tech but a testament to enduring excellence and precision. It signifies a timepiece that:
Offers excellent dependability and accuracy.
Offers assurance of quality across the whole construction of the timepiece.
Is apt to hold its worth more efficiently, making it a wise choice.
Well-known Timepiece Manufacturers
Several renowned brands prioritize COSC certification for their watches, including Rolex, Omega, Breitling, and Longines, among others. Longines, for instance, offers collections like the Archive and Spirit, which feature COSC-validated movements equipped with advanced materials like silicon equilibrium suspensions to boost durability and performance.
Historical Context and the Development of Timepieces
The concept of the timepiece dates back to the need for precise timekeeping for navigation at sea, emphasized by John Harrison’s work in the eighteenth century. Since the official establishment of Controle Officiel Suisse des Chronometres in 1973, the certification has become a standard for judging the precision of luxury watches, continuing a tradition of superiority in watchmaking.
Conclusion
Owning a COSC-certified timepiece is more than an visual choice; it’s a dedication to excellence and accuracy. For those appreciating precision above all, the COSC validation provides peacefulness of thoughts, ensuring that each certified watch will operate dependably under various conditions. Whether for personal contentment or as an investment, COSC-accredited timepieces distinguish themselves in the world of horology, maintaining on a legacy of careful timekeeping.
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