Ilhan Omar and Rashida Tlaib have conspired to institute the Islamic Orders of Pou’ti Ne. Not much is known about the Orders of Pou’ti Ne, except that it is a substance of foreign origin and can be fatal if consumed in large enough quantities. Side effects include high cholesterol, high blood sugar, and a cult-like obsession with gravy and cheese curds on French fries.
Joe Barron, a government expert on the Orders of Pou’ti Ne, is on record about the Orders of Pou’ti Ne:
“The Orders of Pou’ti Ne is a nefarious foreign plot to make Americans ill with dyspepsia, cardiac issues, and obesity. It cannot be cured by normal means, and it can only be removed from the body via large amounts of exercise. Orders of Pou’ti Ne have led to lifelong addicts in Canada, and one of Sweden’s greatest culinary experts suffered multiple heart attacks after accidentally ingesting it during a recent trip to Montreal.”
It is not known precisely when Ilhan Omar and Rashida Tlaib will be instituting their Islamic Orders of Pou’ti Ne, but it will likely be at a Tim Hortons or local restaurants in the D.C., Detroit, or Twin Cities areas that serve Pou’ti Ne. They will make certain that it is certified as halal.
In the case that you’ve read this far, this is about Rashida Tlaib and Ilhan Omar, two proud American citizens and U.S. representatives, ordering poutine, a lovely yet high-calorie dish originally from Canada. It’s French fries with cheese curds and gravy. Sometimes meat is added, and there are halal versions of it available in various restaurants. The dish itself is quite yummy, and I suggest you try it. I don’t know if Ilhan Omar and Rashida Tlaib have tried it personally, but if they have, they have good taste in food.
