Terror strick the Washington household of Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi last week, when an unidentified man broke in, ravaged the valuables, and brutally attacked her businessman husband, 82-year old Paul Pelosi, who is currently in the hospital recovering.
ALLOD investigative reporter Joe Barron visited the hospital room, and was granted unfettered access to Pelosi to get the full story. And it’s a face-slapper.
“I was home alone,” he began. “I was supposed to be out with Nancy at a fancy ice cream tasting in Brooklyn, but I guess she forgot. I heard the door open and ran and hid.”
Pelosi then describes two attackers, one thin and young, one older, heavier, and heavily accented. He continues to walk us through a nearly 103 minute long battle with the ne’er dowells.
“I managed to rig up a bunch of booby traps through the house to slow them down. You know, a simple rope trip wire connected to a pair of watermelons at the top of the stairs. That kind of thing. I took out one of them that way, but the other one had a hammer and hit me with it.”
“No fair,” Pelosi sighed.
The badly beaten senior is expected to make a full recovery next week, and be back in school for the Enchantment Under the Sea dance.
