With everything going on in today’s busy world, the Kyle Rittenhouse trial is an odd distraction.  With a judge that seems nearly manic in his mood swings and jowl boucing, to witnesses’ testimony going back and forth and thoroughly dissected, it’s an attention funnel that drags in supporters and condemners alike.

“He’s innocent because there was a pedo! It was that OTHER guy was a first responder! Comes with the JOB”

However, much of the prosecution’s case rests on not only the janky, childish, irrational circumstance of Rittenhouse even being there, some is based on the sheer overwhelming fact that an underage boy shot and killed two people while not being deputized or affiliated with any law enforcement agency whatsoever.

A new video played during the trial just yesterday seems to depict Rittenhouse laughing maniacally while stopping to slaughter those in his path and seriously undercuts the defense attorney’s case.  Joe Barron of the law firm Barron, Reynolds and Blair opined.

“I don’t know that the video is relevant.  That might not even be Kyle in the footage, for all anyone knows.  And even if it is, wouldn’t YOU laugh while ending the life of a serial child molester?  You know you would.  It’s a natural American response, like pissing on the highway.”

Rittenhouse’s response to the video was a wan smile followed by a very comfortable fart in the witness chair.  When questioned about it, his demeanor was relaxed and he simply offered : “I’m the Punisher.”

I’m Groot and you don’t see me running around blasting.

Marvel editor in chief C.B. Beluski denied the association with the character, and then vanished in a cloud of blue smoke with a “bamf!” noise.

Does the video prove Rittenhouse’s guilt, or is it just another in a long line of details that really don’t make any difference in a clear cut case, caught on goddamn video, for Christ’s sake, that a kid twisted by his psychotic parents and junk on the internet went all Death Wish during a protest?  Let’s let the people decide.  Like they did with Trump!

2 Comments

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