It was 7:45 a.m. West coast time when the two dozen black SUV’s drove up to the compound in Whitewater, Arkansas.  Several men exited, and went straight for the front and rear entrances, guns drawn, eyes slitted in righteous investigation.

The compound’s most famous or, possibly infamous couple wasn’t home, of course.  Bill Clinton is currently touring whorehouses in Europe while his wife Hillary busies herself by handing out ice cream and beer to illegal aliens entering through our southern border.

Ice cream sponsored by Pelosi Scoops, an exciting new confectionary company.

Nonetheless, caretaker Sandy Batt tells the story of being woken up out of a deep weed slumber to the sounds of chaos.

“I was dreaming about Hillary winning her 2016 bid for election.  It was marvelous.  Covid had stayed under control and we used Obama’s plan that he’d set up ahead of time to neutralize it early on.  Wonderful.

Then there came a banging at the door.  I thought it was the mailman that I’ve been schtupping, Cletus.  But it wasn’t.  These men came inside and started rifling through everything.  I just sat there, hoping they wouldn’t find my good weed.”

Agents on the case were mum on what exactly they were in search of, but left sometime around ten with dozens of boxes in the backs of their vehicles.

* UPDATE : The boxes were full of Bill’s porn collection.


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