A source inside the Trump administration has confirmed that there is overwhelming evidence against former President Joe Biden and his family.

“From what we know,” said the source, “Biden family shell companies received more than $300 million in Defense Department contracts that were supposed to benefit Ukraine.”

The source, who may or may not be credible or exist in nature at all, says that rather than sending Ukraine cash like Congress approved, the administration sent weapons and supplies instead:

“They were supposed to get pallets of cash like Iran did, but they got weapons, food, and communications equipment, all of which was manufactured and supplied by Biden family companies.”

What a scam they’re running. Everyone knows that foreign military aid comes in the form of greenbacks delivered in the dead of night by Chinooks. Everyone. If we start funneling that money into American companies, someone might dub it “the military-industrial complex” or something and use it as America’s middle-class welfare system.

“It’s really egregious,” said the source, who said we can only refer to him as Kenny, “My tax dollars should either go to waste or to foreign governments, in cash, so I can complain about it. This whole premise that foreign aid is good for the economy and the world is just wrong.”

We’re not really sure what side we’re supposed to be on anymore, patriots, so we’ll just end it here. God Bless America.