Trump’s Rating at a Record 64%

Our great and dear leader, President Donald Trump, has been working tremendously hard for the last 3 1/2 years to drain the swamp and make America great again. Harder than anyone, ever. Truly.

All of his amazing, tremendous successes are affecting his public opinion rankings, for sure. It’s really incredible what’s happening.

The latest Dunning-Kruger poll, conducted by phone and in-person at churches and nursing homes nationwide, shows Trump’s current rating is 64 percent. Yes, patriots, our dear leader has a DISapproval rating of 64 percent, which is the best, highest disapproval rating of any president at this point in his first term. No one else has ever had such a high number of disapproving voters, ever! It’s really quite amazing, truly. Tremendous. Unprecedented.

Sandy Batt, the highly skilled and very experienced campaign manager for Joe Biden, laughed when she learned of Trump’s historically high disapproval number. “I’m sure he won’t understand. All he’ll hear is ‘the highest number ever’ and think he’s winning. Poor confused Trump.

Even worse, poor confused Trump voters, who treat this demented guy like some kind of bloated, gross orange lord and savior.”

When asked about this poll result, president Dipstick Trump commented, “Someone came up to me this morning and said, ‘Sir, your disapproval rating is the highest number ever recorded for a president in the history of this country.’ I thanked that man and told him I’m doing this all for no pay, while the leftist, socialist, communist, Marxist, elitist un-American voters will do everything they can to run me out of office. Having that highest rating ever shows how tremendously smart the American people are.”

Our intrepid reporter spoke to many White House staffers to get their opinion of Trump’s phenomenal disapproval rating.

No one was willing to speak on the record, but one guy who’s been there since Day One said, “Who are the other 36 percent? I mean, have they not been paying attention? Morons.”