In yet another completely rational and mature decision, former President Donald J. Trump has officially revoked all federal funding for Barack Obama’s Presidential Library, because—according to Trump himself—“Why should we pay for a library that nobody’s gonna read, folks? Nobody reads anymore. Sad!”
The move comes as part of Trump’s “America First, Obama Last” initiative, in which he systematically undoes everything Obama ever touched out of sheer, unfiltered spite.
A Very Real and Serious Budget Concern
Trump announced the funding cut during a press conference that began as an economic update but quickly devolved into a 45-minute rant about how unfair it is that Obama gets a library, but Trump gets lawsuits.
“They wanted to give him millions, MILLIONS, for this thing,” Trump huffed. “A big, fancy building with books, pictures, probably some fake birth certificates—I don’t know, folks, I don’t know.”
He then went on to explain his decision in the most logical, well-reasoned way possible:
“We don’t need another library. Libraries are full of books, okay? Books are long. And boring. And I guarantee you, folks, not one person is gonna read a single book in this place. Not ONE! But they wanna waste taxpayer money on it? No. No thank you.”
When asked what would happen to the funds that were originally allocated to the project, Trump waved his hands dismissively.
“We’ll use it for something better. Something people actually want. Maybe a new Trump Hotel. Maybe a wall. Maybe gold-plated Air Force One seats. Who knows? But not a library. No way. Waste of time.”
Obama Reacts, Trump Responds Like a Toddler
Former President Barack Obama, who has spent years ignoring Trump’s temper tantrums, reportedly responded to the move by shrugging and continuing his day like a normal adult.
This, of course, sent Trump into a spiral.
“He doesn’t even CARE, folks!” Trump later raged on Truth Social. “I take away his library, and he doesn’t even THANK ME. No call, no letter, no NOTHING. Disrespectful! Nobody ever treated me like this (except every world leader, but that’s different)!”
After several more posts, including one where he suggested renaming the “Obama Presidential Library” to the “Totally Failing Barack Hussein Fake Bookstore”, Trump reportedly spent the afternoon furiously ripping up pieces of paper and throwing them on the floor of Mar-a-Lago.
What Happens Now?
With no federal funding, the Obama Presidential Library will now be privately funded—which means it will still be built, just without Trump’s permission (which is the part that really stings for him).
Meanwhile, Trump supporters are already celebrating this bold move against “government waste”, seemingly unaware that Trump has never read a book in his life and once tried to redirect hurricane relief funds to build a border wall.
In the end, Obama will get his library. Trump will get nothing. And in two weeks, he’ll forget this even happened—until someone reminds him, at which point he’ll rant about it all over again.
God Bless America.