The Federal police have been rolling into cities across the country to clean up the crime-infested Democrat created cesspools. One city has observed the success in defending buildings and tear-gassing peaceful protesters and has decided to allow the Feds to control law enforcement in their city full-time. Portland.
No, not that Portland. Portland, Maine.
Portland, Maine, which was best known for being northeast of Boston until this decision, hasn’t been in the news, hasn’t had any kind of a problem with crime, and is the only city in New England with a Republican Mayor, a Republican City Council, and is kinda near where Stephen King lives, but not close enough to have his liberal stench ruin things.
Sandy Batt was able to secure Jacques Strappe, the mayor of Portland who had the balls to call for Federal help, for a brief interview.
“This move makes complete sense. Our budget around here is tight. This is Donald Trump country. We can both show fiscal responsibility and some world-class boot licking to our fellow Portlandians. Nothing exciting ever happens here. With the President’s secret police, nothing will still happen around here.
We’ll get into the news. You’re here, right? Anyway, they need to stay somewhere, they need to eat, and our best projections show that we’ll even get a few protesters to come here and spend some money.
If something bad happens, we’ll own the movie rights. We’ll sell them to the highest bidder and cha-CHING!”
The crime rate in Portland is practically non-existent, which means that all of the criminals in town are plotting for the moment when they will be able to spring their mayhem on the unsuspecting city. Little do they know, the Trump secret police will be waiting, ready for whatever comes their way.
Joe Biden would never consider authorizing this type of action, which is exactly why we need to make sure Donald Trump stays in office this November and Keep America Great Again!
