Jerry Seinfeld Joins Forces with Tim Allen for “A Night of Un-Woke Comedy”

Two of Hollywood’s most successful and epic comedians are joining forces for a hilarious stand-up tour this year, and you’ll be left in the dark if you aren’t excited enough to break out your piggy bank and your old Nissan Versa.

Jerry Seinfeld, of the hit series “Seinfeld” and “Comedians In Cars Getting Stoned” is hitting the road with Tim Allen of “Home Improvement”, “Galaxy Trek”, and “The Santa Cockers” to bring their unique brands of humor to America, live.

The genesis of the tour comes from a single fan suggestion, Joe Barron of Peedrinking Creek, Tennessee, who wrote a long and convoluted post on Facebook this January.

“I think it would be awesome for you two to tour across America while battling chemtrail shooting liberals and freeing kids from evil pizza parlors,” he wrote, somehow in crayon on the internet.  “That would rock.”

Seinfeld took notice and called his friend Tim up, pretending to be a cocaine mule to get his attention.  Allen agreed to the combo after pooping out a few bricks.

Allen, for his part, says he’s been working on new material for the past two years, involving lots of non-woke content like tools, men grunting, and falling down slapstickily.

“It’s going to be wild,” Jerry told reporters gathered at his nearby Dave and Buster’s.  “Tim and I are like peanut butter and sand.  I mean, what is up with that?”

The tour will begin in June at the Itchy Kitty Whorehouse in Nevada, and stretch across the country from there.  Don’t miss it!