Mega maga superstar Tim Allen has made quite a success of himself in Hollywood, and he did it all without murdering someone, Alec Baldwin.

Baldwin’s next picture is called “Guns guns guns”, a heartwarming period piece.

Allen’s fame comes from films like The Santa Clause, Jungle 2 Jungle, and of course, the Toy Story franchise, the animated dollar-printer in which Allen starred as spaceman “Buzz Lightyear”.

After portraying the character for three straight films grossing billions, Allen was summarily fired from the series.  He was given no reason, no “golden parachute” severance pay, and waved unceremoniously out the door.  Many industry insiders believe it was his conservative politics that did him in for the House of the Mouse.

Going back to his roots on television with the popular program Last Man Standing, Allen managed to survive.  But when Pixar released the solo “Buzz Lightyear” movie last year, starring actor Joe Barron as the voice of the hero as a replacement, that’s when Allen had had enough.

“Mr. Allen is filing suit in the thirteenth district court,” said his legal representation Clete Torris in a hastily called press conference last week.  “For illegally firing him over identity politics and replacing him with someone more famous.  He will be seeking the sum of eleventy billion dollars.”

That’s quite an amount of cash to be asking from a movie that actually fairly flopped, making only about 25 million over it’s budget.  But as we know, Tim Allen is nothing, if not persistent.

And a drug mule.  He was a drug mule early in before he was discovered and just barely avoided imprisonment.

8 Comments

Leave a Reply