Kevin Bacon Leads Drag Queen Protest March in Florida

The high-stepping hootenanny homunculus leading a troupe of man-women down Orlando’s Queefington Hill boulevard with signs and megaphones shouting : “We shall overcome?” Is this America?

It sure is, and that Footloose and fancy free young man is none other than Hollywood megastar Kevin Bacon.  The popular and beloved, (and now fully woke), actor is now in front of a group of A Few Good Men to let the politicians at the Capitol in Tallahassee hear what they think of Governor Ron DeSantis and his draconian laws against the LGBTQ community.

Bacon sat down with reporter Sandra Batt at the protest for a short moment to explain himself.

“Drag queens are a long and storied group of people with tradition and class following them, and are not a danger to anyone.  All the old, crusty conservatives are thinking of that Silence of the Lambs movie scene, and basing everything in their lives on it.  It was a movie, people.”

Bacon took a moment to whip off his leather jacket, revealing a delicious mauve blouse and speckled cummerbund.

“You see?  Still Kevin Bacon.  Still your guy from Stir of Echoes and Flatliners.  I live a regular life and do this for fun and entertainment.  What it wrong with conservatives that they have to worry about anyone and everyone’s penis?”

The Florida protest will last until 5p.m. today, and will also feature celebrities Tom Hanks, Ru Paul, and Philamena Collins.